A firefighter left “broken” after his partner had four miscarriages said more support was needed for emergency service workers who experienced pregnancy loss.
Oliver Dent, 29, from Hatfield, said he was accused by Hertfordshire Fire and Rescue Service of “putting the service under strain” due to taking time off to grieve.
He has since helped the service review its baby loss policy and guidance, and urged other emergency services to do the same.
The fire service acknowledged it should have done more to support Mr Dent. Oliver and his fiancée Caitlin Phillips-Diggons are expecting their first baby in November.
“Despite the brigade knowing I was off work due to my fiancée having miscarriages, I was put on ‘sickness monitoring’ and told my absence was putting the service under strain,” Mr Dent said.
“That made me even more stressed.
“To make things worse, I was never contacted by anyone officially while I was off work to ask how I was feeling about the miscarriages.”
According to the NHS, about one in eight pregnancies end in miscarriage, while the loss of three or more pregnancies in a row affects about one in 100 women.
A miscarriage is defined as pregnancy loss during the first 23 weeks.
Hertfordshire Fire and Rescue Service acknowledged it should have done more to support Mr Dent.
Chief fire officer Alex Woodman said: “I have huge respect for Ollie and his fiancée Caitlin, who in spite of all they have been through are fighting to make things better for others in our fire service.
“I recognise that, despite best intentions, the service wasn’t there for them when they needed us, and I’m very grateful to Ollie’s colleagues and managers at Hatfield Station for the support they gave them.”
Mr Woodman said the service had worked with Mr Dent, Ms Phillips-Diggons and the charity Tommy’s to review its baby loss policy and guidance.
“Their determination to make a positive change means that others in Hertfordshire Fire and Rescue Service and Hertfordshire County Council who are experiencing the loss of a child will now be given time to grieve,” he added.
According to Acas, the Advisory, Conciliation and Arbitration Service, those that experience a miscarriage are not entitled to statutory leave.
However, it says: “An employer should still consider offering time off at what can be an extremely difficult time, both physically and emotionally.”
Those that experience pregnancy loss after 24 weeks, known as stillbirth, are entitled to statutory maternity or paternity leave and pay.
“Oliver’s experience shows how important it is that employers and managers understand the impact of pregnancy and baby loss and have clear, compassionate policies in place to support team members affected by it – including dads and partners,” said Jo Barclay-Bowen, deputy director of partnerships at Tommy’s – a pregnancy and baby loss charity.
“We’re working with organisations of all sizes to achieve that.”
In 2022, the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development published results of a survey that suggested about a quarter of employees who had experienced pregnancy or baby loss considered quitting their jobs because of the way they were treated at work.
Earlier this year, NHS England announced its staff would be eligible for paid leave if they, or their partners, experienced a miscarriage.
“No-one should feel like they have to go through this alone without support,” Mr Dent added.
“Everyone has the right to time to grieve and recover without stressing about work.”
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