Tips Clear News Portal Your Ultimate Guide to Clear Tips on Life, Tech, Health, and More Hello Hello ! Welcome to the teubés of the week. Get ready for a good batch of idiots, morons, jerks and other ignoramuses. You have the right to laugh but don’t forget to take a little IQ test to find out if you too deserve to be part of this incredible selection. With that, I leave you, I have to rebutton my shirt because I put Monday with Monday of the week before. Bye.
1. Asking someone else to take care of your kids is a whole concept
“_ Hey, can you send me $250 for the babysitter tonight?
_ Hey, you want me to pay for the babysitter in addition to our date?
_ You’re the guy, aren’t you? I am a single mother of 3 children and if you want a date with me this is the game.
_ Wow! It’s not in my budget. I had planned a very nice evening for us and I can’t add $250 to the evening, I’m sorry.
_ Wow… well have fun on your own tonight. I’m tired of meeting broke guys. »
2. This protester can either win a Caesar or become a footballer
3. It costs nothing to ask
“Hi, I’m a student in your class and I’m sending you an email to let you know that I won’t be able to complete the assignment for tomorrow night because I have a party that night. Is it possible to obtain an extension of the deadline? »
4. Sacred Daniel
“_ I like well-shaved pussies ladies
_ Then wax your pussy well Daniel »
5. Dad, how do we do lesbians?
“If my baby girl is breastfed, will her chances of being a lesbian increase? How to make it stop?
My wife and I just had a daughter. Our first was a boy. He is now 3 years old and he was breastfed. I had no problems with breastfeeding. Now with the little girl, I thought she was going to be breastfed too, I had no problem with that until I saw her do it. It’s been about 2 weeks and I can’t get rid of this feeling that she’s going to become a lesbian. It really attacks my wife’s breasts more than my boy when he was a baby. Doesn’t seem normal and I can’t help but wonder if that’s how lesbians are made? I’m afraid she’s a lesbian if she’s not bottle-fed. Does anyone have any advice or similar experience here? Is this an act of lesbianism? Should I stay mad at my wife for what she’s doing to my kid? Our arguments over this are intensifying. I hate the idea of someone’s **** being fucked in my little girl’s face. »
6. No logic in babies
“Me: eat your vegetables
Baby: no
Me: eat A PLANE
Baby: it’s fucking delicious”
7. A gesture full of common sense
The guy sticks his hand to the ground with glue to protest against global warming and then throws the tube into the manhole. It’s very clever.
8. The capitalist dream
“Pepsi sued 4 Indian farmers and demanded $150,000 each for growing the type of potato used for its Lays brand crisps. »
“What level of capitalism are we at when big corporations can sue poor people for growing food? »
9. Love is blind
“There’s a kid who’s in love with my daughter and gave her his glasses today. His glasses without which he cannot see. Like the guy does everything he can to impress a girl. Renouncing the gift of sight is crazy anyway. »
10. Children are so cute
“My two-year-old daughter gave dad’s macbook a bath because it was ‘too dirty'”
If you liked the teubés, you’ll love the champions of the week.
Source : Facepalm, Dumb, IdiotFightingThings, KidsAreFuckingStupid, Quityourbullshit, Stupidpeopleonfacebook, Win Stupid Prizes, Trashy, mildlyinfuriating, Karma.