Be careful, this top is not for the weak. Get ready to see your own favorite cocktails get smashed in public. Because yes, it is time to restore some truths. Truths that hurt. Truths that denounce, even. Now is not the time to be touchy, because the world of alcohol will take it for its rank.
1. Le Mojito
Why is it overrated ? Because the dosage is messed up about 95% of the time, because you always have fucking mint leaves that get stuck in your straw, and because in the end you never know if you have some left. or if it’s just melted ice cubes. Spoiler: it’s just melted ice cubes.
2. Le Spritz St-Germain
Why is it overrated ? Because he wants to stand out and give himself a chic side, except that in the end it’s not as good as a real Spritz. If the classics are classics, there is a good reason.
3. Le Cosmopolitan
Why is it overrated ? Because it’s served in a super fancy but boring glass since you spill half of it as soon as you try to bring it to your lips (and the taste isn’t crazy either, let’s be honest).
4. The Daisy
Why is it overrated ? Because on paper, it’s super stylish: when you order it, you feel like you’re in Desperate Housewivesbut what’s your problem with the yucky coarse salt on the glass there?
5. Le Punch
Why is it overrated ? Because most of the time it’s just a rough mix of disgusting fruit juices drowned in low quality rum. We will come back to it the day you use fresh fruit.
6. The Mimosa
Why is it overrated ? Because there’s something to disgust you with orange juice for life. Or champagne.
7. Angevin soup
Why is it overrated ? Because we only mix spirits that crack your head and you’re close to alcoholic coma after the second glass.
8. Le Whisky Coca
Why is it overrated ? ‘Cause damn the next time you mix my 12 year old with coke I’ll come over to your house and wash my SIF off with your toothbrush.
9. The Pina Colada
Why is it overrated ? Because it’s sickening after about a minute and a half. We throw the White Russian in the same basket. Whether animal, coconut or soy, leave the milk in its place, it has nothing to do in our cocktails.
10. The sangria
Why is it overrated ? Because usually it’s shit wine with three slices of orange. No, but we have to stop making fun of the world.
11. La Suze Tonic
Why is it overrated ? Because it’s even more bitter than life, which is already very bitter.
12. Le Long Island Iced Tea
Why is it overrated ? Because it’s not because you put all your closet funds in a glass that it’s going to be good. Tequila, gin, vodka, rum, orange liqueur and cola, it’s a kamoulox not a cocktail. And where is the Iced Tea actually? We are still looking.
13. Monaco
Why is it overrated ? Because either you drink beer or you order yourself a grenadine diabolo. If you’re a child in an adult body, you might be better off consulting than ordering anything.
14. Le Sex on the beach
Why is it overrated ? Because pineapple juice leaves you with canker sores that make you want to do anything but have sex.
15. The Negronis
Why is it overrated ? Because your thing is not a cocktail but just a big shot. No matter how hard you try to deceive us with your slice of orange, we don’t get it.