Top 15 other French things that should be a World Heritage Site

This Wednesday, November 30, 2022, the baguette returned to UNESCO’s intangible heritage of humanity. Yes, that good old loaf of bread. If I was a nerd, I’d be screaming ” COCK-A-DOODLE DOO “, but luckily I haven’t fallen that low yet. Instead, and because victories must generate other victories, I suggest that you engrave other French marvels in the tablets of Unesco. The world will be better off.

1. Minitel

Quite simply, the flagship of French industry. On the Internet side, it’s much too rich, like a cheddar cassoulet, a raclette kebab or Elon Musk.

2. Jul

Let’s forget Molière, Hugo, Rimbaud and company: the real French poet is the J (which is the S, as you well know).

Jul

3. O’tacos

The Turks have the kebab, the Greeks have the… Greek, and France also has its gastronomic jewel: a good big XXL tacos containing no less than 12 meats of unknown origin. To be reserved for the finest palates.

4. Mbappe

The man who scored goals faster than his shadow… what does nobody call him that?

5. Giroud’s haircut

The capillary aerodynamics of this man is amazing. It allows him to shoot from the head at a speed of around 120 km/h. What a man. What hair, especially.

6. Strikes

It’s our specialty after all, so might as well be proud of it.

TOPITO TEXTE BINGO greves

7. Canelés

THE SAVIER VOU? The canelé takes its name from “canaule”, a kind of 19th century egg-yolk bread of which it is the enriched version. I am personally blown away. If you want more dessert name origins to impress your significant other in bed, click the link.

8. The inspired “yeah”

See that thing people do when they say “yeah” while gulping a lot of air instead of talking like normal people? It’s annoying, but original, so it has its place in the memories of humanity.

9. Anti-Parisian hatred

A local specialty. Finally, especially among the bouseux mdrrrrrr (I’m kidding, I’m from Lille).

TOPITO vs vertical parisien sourit

10. Pastis

Yum yum the chilled pastis drops in the go-throat.

Plan de travail 1 copie 5 1

11. Petanque

To all those who prefer Mölkky, I want to tell you: you love France or you actually leave it. You make me sick.

MONTAGE super mario petanque

12. The 49.3

We’ve already invented something that almost allows you to have full powers, and in addition we decided to give it a rotten name. We are really too strong.

Oh look, here are times when we would like to use the 49.3.

CLIP 2 49 3 borne shrek

13. Jean Castex’s press conferences

Too many bars this guy I swear, frankly I sometimes miss him, rest his soul. We will never do better. I hope he reads me from where he is (at RATP headquarters a priori).

CLIP castex couvre feu2 1

14. The bashing of Manuel Valls

Too many bars this guy I swear mdrrrr, frankly I never miss him, not peace to his soul. We are definitely doing better.

VALLS BOOBA2

15. The vital card

Super practical this little piece of plastic. Yes, I could have said that too about a cap, a clothes peg, a pick or a 6-sided die, but no, I was talking about the vital card, the only thing that allows you to have drugs for free.

TOPITO bulle carte vitaale 1

And what would you register for at Unesco? And no, tar is not a good answer, it is not French.

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