Top 20+ tweets that made us laugh this week #458

Hi little friends, another great week is starting! First of all, happy October (because any excuse is good to turn a normal day into a celebration of life) and welcome to this week’s top tweets. We know that you are impatiently waiting for this moment and we go to great lengths to select the crème de la crème of tweets, those with a lot of humor and fat. Good tasting !

MONDAY SEPTEMBER 26

1. “But what is he doing here??”

2. In pajamas under the duvet

3. It’s hard to imagine a more ridiculous death than being beaten to death with a candlestick in a library by a guy named Colonel Mustard.

hard to imagine a more embarrassing death than being beaten with a candlestick in a library by someone named colonel mustard
— fredesque (@FredTaming) September 26, 2022

4. Termites on Twitter

Let’s eat Jerry’s house, it looks delicious!

Ok – ok – ok – ok

TUESDAY SEPTEMBER 27

5. Would be about saving energy

6. Do you prefer soup or raclette?

Do soup parties exist? we just go to someone’s house and everyone brings a soup and we share them together
— Baltha in prison (@Baltha_bagnard) September 27, 2022

WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 28

7. Why it looks like they’re going to start a podcast

8. Everyone makes an effort

9. Can’t wait for them to tell us that they take showers and not baths

that’s it, we understood that you were wearing quechua fleeces, that you used a drying rack and that you washed your clothes in the river, go take your medal and stop this ridiculous cinema for pity’s sake
— Niki (@NikiShey) September 28, 2022

10. Graphic design students cry blood

11. Prince George says to his classmates: “My father is going to be king so you better watch out”, so Prince George is a mini Draco Malfoy

THURSDAY SEPTEMBER 29

12. It’s true that people in shorts in winter always make us laugh.

there’s a student who walks around in a t-shirt and shorts, I point out to him that it’s not the best outfit to wear given the weather, he replies “for me, it’s a humorous performance to be in shorts when it’s 15°C” followed by “I could die for my art”
— charlou (joan nestle era) (@charloumermu) September 29, 2022

13. “We actually met before” Okay well I don’t remember you. Have you ever thought about being more memorable and less insignificant?”

“actually we’ve met before” okay well I don’t remember you. Have you considered being less forgettable and insignificant
— Luke Mones (@LukeMones) September 29, 2022

14. To err is human but this is abused

This morning I tell Eunice that Coolio is dead she said “Iglesias? » at the time I said nothing but now I think about it I have tears
— lexie (@craylexie) September 29, 2022

FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 30

15. It didn’t make sense to bring out the first film in theaters.

16. My wedding didn’t even make it to my sister’s September Instagram carousel but her Starbucks order did.

My wedding didnt even make it into my sister’s Instagram september dump but her Starbucks order did
— kidjaheen (@kidjaheen) September 30, 2022

17. A little genius

Busy days, I didn’t see my son last night or this morning, when that happens, I leave him a note, this morning it was on a post-it stuck on his cup. He wanted to do the same, but he didn’t have a post-it…
So he stuck a note on my door. WITH GLUE. pic.twitter.com/NfA5xSTmo6
“Lady Dumpling?? (@lady_dumpling) September 30, 2022

18. My 7 year old daughter told me that Jeremy gave her all the answers at school. As the conversation progressed, I realized that it was her brain that she had called Jeremy”

My 7yo told me that Jeremy gives her all the answers at school. As the conversation went on I found out that Jeremy is her brain. She named her brain Jeremy.
— Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) September 30, 2022

SATURDAY 1ST OCTOBER

19. I would have cried too

Whining at Camaïeu I have to liquidate my 100 bucks gift card but it’s too ugly
— Jean Valjeanne (@yourasstomars) October 1, 2022

20. “He should take over the role of Christian Grey” so…

21. Best of all punchlines

22. Me: Opens the fridge / Bag of broccoli: Please… / Me: Closes the fridge

me: [opens fridge]
bag of decaying broccoli: pleas-
me: [closes fridge]
— jame (@kloogans) October 1, 2022

23. The good ass as we like it

24. Bad timing, it’s really bad luck

Nooooooo grandma caning 5 minutes after I took the BeReal of the day??? I have too much hate, did I miss that?
— Maxime (@maximebiaggi) October 1, 2022

SUNDAY OCTOBER 2

25. Timothée Chalamet is the new Benedict Cumberbatch because you can say any word that sounds a bit like and we understand who you’re talking about. Tiffany Chevy. Timpanogos Charlemagne. Symphony Cabernet. Jiminy Castaway

timothée chalamet is the new benedict cumberbatch in the sense that you can say ANYTHING and we know who you mean. tiffany chevrolet. timpanogos charlemagne. symphony cabernet. jiminy castaway.
— abs (@itsabsaf) October 1, 2022

26. When I learn that my family ate something good when I was not there

Come on, it’s time to eat so I’ll leave you. Have a nice week and start thinking about your Halloween costume (it’s soon).