Top 30+ tweets that made us laugh this week #460

Hey buddies, it’s time to sing along with some of the best tweets from the past week. Even if it’s super funny and downright exceptional, I hope you have other opportunities to laugh during the week. If this is not the case, I advise you to exercise your zygomatics by listening to compilations of farts on YouTube (it helps). With that, I wish you a good slice of laughter while reading these little jokes and anecdotes!

MONDAY OCTOBER 10

1. They think everything is allowed

I’m shocked the man I thought was my father was actually Nicolas Canteloup who had been imitating him for 25 years I feel like throwing up I hate bald people
— Mister Poules (@MisterPoules) October 10, 2022

2. Best way to enslave siblings

I had invented a game with my sister, where I had to pretend to sleep and she had to tidy up quietly, otherwise she loses.
– Dear? (@dilnazalmv) October 9, 2022

3. It’s so embarrassing that I would have taken this secret to my grave instead.

4. She could have said thank you

5. New Breton insult

You’re not the most aligned menhir in Carnac.
.?.
— Brezhoneg & Deter & ChaosType??? (@saulbey1) October 10, 2022

6. You always have to be friends with this colleague who knows the tricks

There is a work colleague he told me PACS you then get married then civilly in stride so you take the holidays of the PACS and marriage the good tips of pirates we take lol
— ???? (@walid_bskr) October 10, 2022

7. They took the expression at face value I think

Really the biggest sorcery in college is the hazelnut coffee that tastes like hazelnuts when it’s just coffee with a dab of milk.
— Cha? (@BlastEnvy) October 10, 2022

TUESDAY OCTOBER 11

8. He must be at La Sorbonne-Nouvelle

JV PETER UN CABLE the amphitheater ceiling broke he knocked out the teacher we’re in oggy and the cockroaches or what
— sal (@sywdcw) October 11, 2022

9. Earned

the fact that they release the film November in October????? I ran over a cyclist this morning he’s in my trunk
— niqo ? (@niqo_tv) October 11, 2022

10. Fear of the future

But guys if at 40 they are not passionate about hiking, will they die or what?
— Madame Corn (@MadameMais) October 11, 2022

11. We give him the benefit of the doubt

If it is the guy who killed JFK he was aiming for a boar but he was dazzled by the sun, we don’t know.
— It’s a gift (@AtheismisComing) October 11, 2022

12. A busy to-do list

13. It’s cute old people

ptdrrr I called a patient on her landline she tells me she’s not at home???? you take me for a jug Bernadette ???
— stark (@camdemxo) October 11, 2022

14. Best Compliment

I think back to the guy in a club who passed by me and said “you’re really beautiful gg” with a thumbs up before disappearing
— a slut for restful sleep (@evakugisaki) October 11, 2022

16. Strength to him, we know this mess

WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 12

17. He has no limits anymore

I took a mirabelle apple compote she said salam the khoyas??
– the beauty?? (@bee_) October 12, 2022

18. Want to vomit

This morning, 9:10 a.m., the corridors of Nation are crowded but a man decided to lower his pants and SHIT in the middle of the population
— .Kaolin. (@idvd_x) October 12, 2022

THURSDAY OCTOBER 13

19. So excited

Disguise myself as a gas station for Halloween so I can bang a huge cock??
— Inox tag ?? (@Inoxtag) October 13, 2022

20. I hope he has RTTs

I live next to an oven in Paris, yesterday I met a lookout I know. I ask him about his news, he tells me that he has been raised. I rep “ah that’s good! » he says to me « normal with inflation » ptddddrrr my France
— Jules (@LouzyFrench) October 13, 2022

21. A Classic

I watched a documentary about porn disorders really guys it’s scary, from today I decided to stop watching the documentaries
—Daiki ?????? (@daikidaouu) October 13, 2022

FRIDAY 14

22. Life is a female dog, we have the right to sigh

my only personality trait is letting out a huge sigh at his mother for no reason every 10 minutes
celine? (@graindecel_) October 14, 2022

23. If you cut an onion, you’re not lazy

“lazy recipe” and you see them take out a frying pan and a cutting board
— CYBAH (@belin2spop) October 14, 2022

24. “Too weird, my illness won’t pass”

I’m hugely ill, my throat hurts too much, I can’t get better, it’s horrible, in short, a little cigarette
— saucebebe ???????? ????????????????“??“ (@saucebebe) October 14, 2022

25. The Story of a Life

– What did you do ?
– Well before I was a baby and I grew up to 5 years old it’s a lot anyway…
– No, but at school.
– Oh! I believed in my life.
— Madame Corn (@MadameMais) October 14, 2022

26. If we don’t teach them too…

You see Goldman on TV.
I tell my 7 year old daughter, “You know I had all her tapes”
– “What is a tape? “
– “it’s like a CD but older“
– “What is a CD? “
*go cry in the garden..”
— Rod Serlings (@Rod___Serling) October 14, 2022

27. Imagine Jean-Francois Mars

bruno mars my name is bruno it doesn’t shock anyone
— TICES (@woetices) October 14, 2022

SATURDAY 15

28. They need to learn to slow down

My shoes are complaining that I’ve gained weight, but what are their soles…
— Veskii (@Veskinho) October 15, 2022

29. And it’s all to his credit

There is a TD manager who arrived late, she told us “excuse me, I was in police custody”
— emohokagehateaccount (@OntNos) October 15, 2022

30. Thanks for sharing

31. An artificial intelligence when asked for a picture of salmon in a river

SUNDAY 16

32. Wondering if it’s not done on purpose

Which was your favorite? Vote in the comments, we’ll draw a winner and pay his heating bill this winter.